The Romance of Therapy

I had a nice chat with my supervisor last week as he filled out my second assessment form.
He’s been in the business a long time and certainly has his own thoughts of what makes a good therapist. He said two things that I thought were interesting.

First, that right now I (and most interns) am in the Romantic Period of practicing therapy. This is the time when our ideals are still very much informing our work. Which flows into his second opinion: that therapist’s have to be able to ‘move away from their stories’ in order to really become clinicians. Seasoned therapists, he said, always can tell when a therapist can’t escape their own story. He feels that the therapist who can’t detach and leave the story behind (or within) will not be able to access the level of clinical expertise needed to do the work.

Which begs the question: what is the work of the therapist according to this man?

I responded that I thought his idea was interesting and worth noting. Certainly I am still idealistic – I’ve only been doing this six months compared to his thirty years. I also said that it was interesting that he felt there was a need to move away from my own internal story – I agree that sometimes it gets in the way. That’s why we’ve been taught to think about clinical snags the way we have. However, my learning from school takes a different slant on the way we ‘handle’ our story.

I don’t really believe we can ever detach completely from our story. I do think that we can be very aware of our stories and patterns. And I hope to continue to work collaboratively with other therapists to keep my awareness of Self alive. My supervisor doesn’t communicate very well and I don’t think he would disagree with this. He has seen my edges and continues to challenge their place in my clinical picture of my clients. I also have a hunch that his own style reflects his own story.

Ultimately, what I want to do is have my own story be simply that: my story. It can work as radar, it can inform me of certain non verbal information that is alive in the room, it may even misguide me occasionally which can also be used to work collaboratively with a client.
So, it was interesting information – an interesting point of view that spoke more to what he wants to see in my future. Otherwise, I am right on track, doing good and sometimes exceptional work. I’ve been pretty honest about my process. While it has served me well being assessed in relationship to my tracked competencies, it has also brought forth advice from my supervisor as to what he wants to see in my future.

I can deal with that.